My son was 5 years old when I met my current husband, who has pretty much raised him for the last 10 years. In contrast, my son's biological father was absent from his life for long periods of time, and when he was around he was a 'Disney Land Dad.' In addition, my son felt like he lost his place, as ‘the baby' in the family when we adopted another child five years ago. Then, a year ago, we adopted again (through the foster parenting system). Despite our best intentions my son has felt left out and unloved. Things became worse when my son began smoking pot (alone in our home). We went to therapy and he 'promised' to quit, but was caught several times after that. He despises my husband and says he was never there for him. I see that he has projected his feelings of loss of his biological father onto my (type A) husband. My son is currently living with his biological father and won't speak to my husband (although he warmed up to me after 4 weeks and my realization that I was not … [Read more...]
Family Therapy: Helping Aging Parents, and Staying Sane
Will and Marilyn had married late and had kids even later. With their kids entering adolescence, they were confronted with the possibility of becoming caregivers for Marilyn’s widowed mother after she fell, breaking her hip. Sarah has been a frequent volunteer for years, ever since retiring from the school district. But her health has been failing recently and she’s not sure how much longer she can live alone. She doesn’t want to live in a retirement home, but the last thing she wants to do is disrupt her children’s lives. Edward is a widower and has cancer that has spread to his liver. His children have A expressed concern over his living conditions, believing that he has not been caring for himself properly. Definitions and Key Thoughts for Helping Aging Parents Aging is a natural process. The rate at which people age varies widely according to many factors such as family history, emotional attitude, chronic medical conditions, and lifestyle. Although the risk of disability and … [Read more...]