"How can I change my mindset as a caregiver to keep it from draining me emotionally?" Thanks for this question about being a caregiver—let me give it a shot. Also, before you sent this question you wrote me briefly to explain you are particularly interested in caregiving as it applies to caring for aging parents—so I tried to focus on that area of care-giving in specific. Caring for aging parents can be a rewarding and gratifying experience. However, just how gratifying it is can depend on a lot of different issues including: • Your own health • Your financial resources • Your emotional resilience • and whether or not you are raising children (or caring for others as well). So while being a caregiver is commendable, it is not the best option for everyone. The Sandwich Years The “sandwich years” is an expression that refers to middle-aged people who are both raising children of their own and caring for their parents. They are “sandwiched” between two … [Read more...]
Trauma: Counseling Information on Trauma and Help for Overcoming a Traumatic Event
PORTRAITS James woke suddenly in the middle of the night. His heart was pounding in his chest and his sheets were tangled around him. His nightmare had seemed so real that at first he couldn’t figure out where he was. His accident has occurred years ago, but lately he had been having frequent dreams about it. Ali had been in several bad relationships throughout college- usually with older men. She is beginning to realize that her desperate need for affection from men comes from the time she watched her father walk out on her mother. Her memory of that night and the pain she felt hasn’t faded a bit. DEFINITIONS & KEY THOUGHTS Trauma is considered to be any situation that shakes one to the core and is beyond their control. Examples of trauma include childhood abuse, rape, abortion, a car accident, domestic violence, or many other types of events. Whatever the situation may be, a trauma could ultimately lead to mental disorders or even suicide. Recovery from a trauma is … [Read more...]
Boston Family Therapy
Raising a family is not easy—and being a member of the family can sometimes be a struggle. Family therapy is based on the belief that the family is a unique social system with its own structure and patterns of communication, which are determined by many things—the parents’ beliefs and values, the personalities of all family members and the influence of the extended family, such as grandparents, aunts and uncles. The result of these variables is that each family develops its own unique personality, which is powerful and affects all of its members. Anyone who has a condition that interferes with their life and the lives of the other family members may find family therapy beneficial. Usually, the better the family functions the lower the stress level for the person with the health problem. Family therapy has been successful in treating many different types of families in a variety of situations, including the following. The parents have conflict with their relationship. A child … [Read more...]
Parenting: Counseling Information for Parents and Tips for Overcoming Parenting Problems
PORTRAITS Cathy has received three calls from the principal of her son’s school in the past week. Her son is constantly getting in trouble and she is becoming frustrated because she has no idea what to do about it. Doreen’s two daughters are constantly fighting with one another. She can barely get anything done because one of them always seems to be running to her angry, hurt, or in tears. DEFINITIONS & KEY THOUGHTS Parenting is not an easy task. As a parent you are given the authority over your children and must assume control of how they are raised. One’s role as a parent is constantly changing. As children grow older and mature, one’s role becomes less active until eventually they serves as a friends and advisor to their adult children. There are various key components that contribute to good parenting. Among the most important are: Love. Children need physical contact, hugs, words of encouragement and affirmation, and quality time- all of which communicate … [Read more...]
Aging: Information on the Natural Process of Aging and Help for Caregivers of Aging Individuals
PORTRAITS Irene recently lost her husband and is now forced to battle cancer on her own. A neighbor is concerned with her living conditions and is worried that Irene is having trouble taking care of her self properly. David and Sheila did not choose to have children until much later in life. Just as their children are entering their teens, David and Sheila were presented with the choice of becoming caregivers for Sheila’s widowed mother after she fell, injuring her hip. Bernice has been a frequent volunteer at the hospital ever since retiring from her nursing position. However, recently her health has been declining and she is not sure how much longer she will be able to continue volunteering, never mind living on her own. DEFINITIONS & KEY THOUGHTS Aging is a normal and natural process that everyone must undergo at his or her own time and pace. The rate at which one ages cannot be controlled, however, it is influenced by several factors including emotional attitude, family … [Read more...]